Sometimes ...
- I wonder if anyone out there really listens, I mean I am sure they are "listening", but do they understand ... its hard to find someone to really confide in, I really dont know the friends that I have made here. I go from having friends that I have known for 14 years to having friends that I have known for months ... they dont get me ... they wont understand ... so I just deal with it, keep things to myself and just truck on ... 3 and a half months left until I can return to where I belong ...
... along those lines ... dreams ... ever have the gut feeling, the itch in the heart, or that thought that just wont leave your brain! I continue to have this feel/dream no matter where I am at or what I am doing ... in my sleep I dream it ... while awake I day dream about it! while getting lost in this thought it feels like I am supposed to be along that path ... like its where I am supposed to be ... I actually feel a pain in my chest when I get rolling with ideas and plans but there is nothing I can do about ... i've been told by family members and friends of family that there was always something about me and that I was meant to do big things that no one in my family has ever done ... I was starting along that path and realized that I had "cut corners" and that set me back ... now I find myself retracing steps to fix my path and I dont know if I will be where I was at ... but the dream and thoughts just eat at me ... like there is something stronger saying "what the hell are you doing here! u need to be over here doing this ... this is what you are meant to be doing!" ... and yet I find myself here ... locked in ... not being able to get out ... so I just deal with the pain ..............
... along those lines ... dreams ... ever have the gut feeling, the itch in the heart, or that thought that just wont leave your brain! I continue to have this feel/dream no matter where I am at or what I am doing ... in my sleep I dream it ... while awake I day dream about it! while getting lost in this thought it feels like I am supposed to be along that path ... like its where I am supposed to be ... I actually feel a pain in my chest when I get rolling with ideas and plans but there is nothing I can do about ... i've been told by family members and friends of family that there was always something about me and that I was meant to do big things that no one in my family has ever done ... I was starting along that path and realized that I had "cut corners" and that set me back ... now I find myself retracing steps to fix my path and I dont know if I will be where I was at ... but the dream and thoughts just eat at me ... like there is something stronger saying "what the hell are you doing here! u need to be over here doing this ... this is what you are meant to be doing!" ... and yet I find myself here ... locked in ... not being able to get out ... so I just deal with the pain ..............
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