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19 April 2006 

Now I know how an addict feels ...

or the "crazy" person with thoughts that dont stop running through their heads. Today I went through what I thought was a flashback, when really it was a series of seminars that fed the monster that eats at me everyday. It was exactly what I was doing before joining the military and it just made my thoughts go 100 miles an hour. The great thing is that I still get the ideas that I think sets me aside from the rest of the joes out there, but the bad thing is that I cant make the ideas stop. I came up with an idea that I might persue in some way shape or form while in the military ... I figure if I am stuck here for 3 and half more years then I might as well make an attempt to ease my addiction. Now I just have to worry about when the hunger is going to be too much to handle and I acctually have a mental break down. For now ... i'll just sit here and wait for my next fix ...